10.01.2023

The Creating Heart

Draw a curtain over the mirror

Make things that weren’t before

you made them

Existence can be such a 

fruitful beautiful experience

A child playing on the seesaw

by himself

forgetting it’s time for lunch

(The shame of throwing food

out because we’re afraid)


Anything that isn’t out is in

Allow yourself to let the

window open a little bit

Every room has lungs

Water might be tasteless

but every air has smell

Even when we can’t make

love we can make music


The only mistakes you

should laugh at are your own

We can’t all do the same thing

That’s why we do them differently

Say the same thing 3

different times in 3 different

                                           ways

2.05.2021

pelerine, abtibilde, pokemoni

Unde fugi unde fugi

Visezi ca un rinocer intr-un carusel

ai coaste de titan si te intorci cu fata spre prag

ce te apuca

ai gulerul lat iti atinge sfoara de la gat

da-ti-o jos 

lasa pe maine pacatele astazi ai suflet

pistoalele umplele doar cu apa

daca vrei sa ai parul scurt

taie-l

daca vrei sa il ai lung

nu te du nicaieri

toate vin acum sau mai tarziu

cand iti tai unghiile sa nu uiti ca tot din tine fac parte

si oriunde la arunci sau le pastrezi

tot adn-ul tau il vor tine

pelerine, abtibilde, pokemoni

tot copil esti si cu card de credit

si cu par sub brat

daca nu-ti mai place cartoon network

apuca-te de copaci vezi cat de sus te poti cureci

cu cat mai putin te cateri cu atat mai mult ai de crescut

pune-ti coatele pe masa 

esti doar putin obosit

12.21.2020

I really wanna burn some things

I really wanna burn some things
In a blazing fire, I really wanna burn some things
I wanna burn my faults, my fears, my what ifs
Burn all the losing lottery tickets I keep under my pillow
All these single socks, their pointless mystery and expectation
Burn all the receipts of unnecessary impulses
I wanna burn kilograms of steel
I wanna burn the helplessness I felt when help was available
I wanna burn the unconscious envy of my all friends’ success
Burn the T-shirt that I wore for the opportunity that could’ve changed my life
Burn all the cold sores and their week’s parade
I wanna burn the plane ticket for the flight I couldn’t make back home because of the crown germ
Burn the regret of ever leaving there
I wanna burn the leftover racism, sexism, homophobia my beautiful parents passed down unto me
Wanna burn all the uncomfortable conversations we’ve had that could’ve easily be solved if we listened more
Burn half the instincts that still linger with me from my careless teenage years
Burn the strict and anxious adult that I am Monday - Friday from 8 to 3
Wanna burn the callous enemies of my grandmother’s lungs
I wanna burn this year’s calendar
I wanna burn the pretentious scoffs at honest attempts
Wanna burn the resentment index I point at my passport
The unsatisfied looks I give my arms, legs, belly in the mirror
All the missed unreciprocated calls and texts
Burn my favourite shirt so I’m not afraid to stain it anymore
I wanna burn my stubborn workshop nails
I wanna burn the impatient sighs I breathe down on God’s neck
I wanna burn my daily growing cynicism
Burn all the endless jigsaws of injustice
The prejudice against the fortunate ones and their sons
The anger towards all those who don’t know better, feel better, communicate better, research better, trust better, understand better or have not had an opportunity to because of their surroundings, their environment, their parents, their teachers, their community, their circumstances, their library or lack thereof because of the powers that be
I wanna burn Moloch
And once the fire eats all this
I’ll light a candle with it
And keep it until my birthday
So I can blow my wish
Right through it

5.21.2020

Text #2

You are a line
not the painting 
the one that binds it all together
there is no reason without thought
passion without breath or 
taking your shoes off with the laces still tied
only some beautiful things just happen
others happen because you keep trying
would it be amazing or boring
if everyone could spin plates on their noses
it won’t make sense until it does
the sunflower, the wave, the kiss 
the line not knowing where it was headed

4.20.2020

Infinite Blue

my friend called me today
after I tried to last night
his voice was different
solemn but calm
like a hidden lake
somewhere outside a cave

he called me by my full first name
in the way that one would after not 
seeing someone since adolescence 
and now here they are in the same
retirement home

he said something happened last night
while watching the bearded men sing 
hymns and odes, prayers and chants
he looked above and closed his eyes
and there inside himself he asked
to see the light

waterfalls at the end of the forrest
warmth after an arctic expedition 
air when you reach the surface
freedom of a faultless slave
forgiveness when you wrong

he opened his eyes but
the light wasn’t there
something else did happen
what was thought to be the twinkling of a passing-by plane 
proved to be a star
this star was blinking and each time
it came back it did so
brighter and brighter

then so did another
and another
until seven of these stars
were all growing 
illuminating beacons
through the darkness of the sky
and when he looked back 
at the singing bearded men
that’s when he discovered it

“I saw an Infinite Blue
a Blue so perfect
Endless Blue
unlike any blue my eyes had ever seen 
or imagined before
bottomless ocean halo
immense clear softness
vast perpetual
and I knew then that it didn’t exist in this world
but came from somewhere else

then I felt 
the Joy
lay itself on top of me like a new bedsheet
the release of senses
a Joy more than any thick happiness 
had embellished me before 
stretched stillness, a nameless peace 
that never will I forget”

as I paused he said
“I don’t expect you to understand 
I don’t have the words to make you
the ones I need aren’t here
but they’re out there 
with that Blue”

he called his friend
who was also watching 
the men with beards singing 
to ask if he’d seen the Blue
but the friend hadn’t seen it

he told me this
then spoke of my heart
and of poor and lonely children 
with a truth in his cadence
that some old trees know of
that I felt my own was lacking
or abashed so I spoke little back

he thanked me for what I’d done for him
for the food we ate
the bed we shared 
under the roof I had
and then he said

“maybe one day you’ll find them
when everything will be ready
and tell me about them
like I did you about
Infinite Blue”

after we hung up
I thought about what happened
trying to make sense of it
and thought about my friend
how he was before today
what was in his voice
and when we’ll speak again

now it’s night
there’s no bearded men singing anymore
no recitals or petitions
my eyes are wide open

I’m checking social media
some other friend saw a line of thirty bright dots moving above
a string of satellites
Elon Musk has graced
but nothing blue

another has got his mantra
that never will he tell a soul
with it transcending somewhere 
inside alone under the ceiling and there
he is happy 
with pure colours, candles and visions

and me, I am here
standing in the garden
wearing shoes with no laces
looking at the dark sky
wondering how can I see something




x

4.19.2020

April 13th or twelve days after

You are an object of love
Roll your eyes back
Conversations with a drunken father
Like the difference between sparkly and soda
water
Paint your nails your least favourite colour to
get used to death
If we could make love with our phones
How many secrets would it whisper
Waking up one morning being
Effortlessly happy
A boiled egg is as exciting
As the wet dreams of a twelve year old
The blessing of forgetting all your fears
Accepting a mother's Godly love
So unfiltered it would suffocate a bee
Have your coffee however you desire
It's alright to change the rules as you move along
Read the die that fell on the floor
There's no reason not to

4.12.2020

to Alexander the sous chef

this is an old one

Lucas arts didn't invent the lightsabre okay?
We invented the lightsabre don't talk about
Lucas arts as if they're some kind of alien
broadband network they're us
Or we're them
Don' matter
You get my point anyway I'm off to lunch
I have a date with a chopstick dealer see
you later


                                                  , Aligator